What would you do ?

[God-I-Suck]

So I recently put myself into the most stressful time of my life. I've done and said things with my girlfriend of only 3 months and her mother found out absolutely all of it. She told almost half of her family and forbid me from seeing her or talking to her. I was extremely close to my girlfriends family including her brothers, sisters and mom. It feels like I betrayed them all, I can't even look them into the face anymore - her brother was one of my great friends and I back stabbed him. He goes to my school as well. Now I cannot see her or talk to her until the next school year when she goes to my school .. We have been caught trying to contact each other numerous times. My family continues to ask me about her . Little do they know I tell them lies saying she is grounded or cutting the conversation short and changing it. When I thought it couldn't get any worse my close friends are beginning to drift away from me and I haven't a clue of what I have done. I destroyed the best relationships of my life and the out look is going downhill. I have to live every day of this summer break knowing it could have been so many times better. I regret it all. This feeling is worst then guilt.

But can there still be hope ? My girlfriend's mom says if I wait for my girlfriend until the next school year (which I am currently doing) then she will know I am serious about loving her. Can I really gain someones trust back after demoralizing their daughter?

I'm not here to cry and whine about my life, but just coming to seek wisdom from one of the best community of persons I know. So let me ask you this question:

What would you do?

[DarkTrinity]

Ummm, how old are you?

[tehrozzy]

Ummm, how old are you?

Based off his Forum profile data, 16.

[Tyco-RC]

Well if your serious about this girl and want to be with her, do exactly what her mum says as you stated you are currently doing.

There isnt much else you can do, appologies only get you so far. Action speak louder than words.

I would carry on trying to talk to her so she doesnt feel like you;'ve forgotten or moved on from it.

As for your friends, we all driff apart, its a part of life. Try having a 'get together' with your friends and do something that you used to do with them, like going to the cinema etc.

When I moved out of my parents to live with my girlfriend I lost some close friends but made new ones and I have recently starting talking to them over FaceBook and MSN so all is not lost for you.

As you can see i'm not the best at these sort of things but I hope everything works out for the best, and good luck!

[EpicPhailure]

Although most people don't realize it until it's too late, everything a parent does is intended to aid their child.

From what it sounds like, the gf's mother really does love her daughter, and doesn't want her to get hurt. She wouldn't lie to you by saying that, just to go back on her words after the summer. Just do what she says and wait it out, and then you two (three?) will probably sort it out and get it done peacefully, and probably mend your relationship with your gf's family.

Friends drift away naturally, it's just what happens over time. Some people who you think will be with you for the rest of your life you'll probably never hear from again in the future, and some people who you've never ever talked to will become your best friends. Again, time pretty much the head honcho running life, and there isn't much you can do except hold on for the ride.

[God-I-Suck]

Ummm, how old are you?

Yes, I am 16 years old, and you didn't answer my question lol. Okay yeah, I am young and I have the rest of my life ahead of me and I don't even need to be worrying about these things right now. However, given I had some of the best and happiest relationships of my life, I'm not just going to throw them away now. Also, I know what you're thinking; you're only 16 years old, you don't even know what love is! Haha well you're just going to have to take my word on it when I say I do.. let me worry about that. I'm just looking for some advice (:

As you can see i'm not the best at these sort of things but I hope everything works out for the best, and good luck!

Aha every little bit counts Tyco , thank you (:

Although most people don't realize it until it's too late, everything a parent does is intended to aid their child.

Wise words buddy (: glad your still around to help me out when I need it EP.

[EpicPhailure]

No problem man :)

[DarkTrinity]

Well the answer could possibly change my response.. When you said 'when we go to the same school next year', it made me think you're in middle school going into high school, in which case I would've had a slightly rude response.. :D
But yea, like everyone else said, Wait it out, try to remain friends, if her mom sees you're actually serious about her daughter then she would probably keep her word, or maybe even forgive you sooner. Of course this is all said without knowing the severity of these "things" that you said and did were.....
Heck, you may even come to find that she's not the one for you and may find someone else. 3 months may seem like a long time in high school, but in real life, it's not very long. And keeping in mind the majority of high school sweet hearts don't stay together after high school... (though I'm currently proof of the opposite) ;D
Just things to keep in mind.

[God-I-Suck]

Just things to keep in mind.

Haha thanks DT (: Well the things were doing were fooling around , we didn't have sex . I'm not stupid enough to have sex right now and neither is she , phew lol :P but I am stupid for fooling around anyway when I knew the consequences -_- I'll keep what you said in mind . She may not be the one , but then again she might be aha . However we are currently very strong in the relationship and I think things will improve as time progresses , According to my scientific calculations. jk. lol.

[Lingus]

but I am stupid for fooling around anyway

Wait seriously? That's what you did? Why is that an issue? That's what teenagers do isn't it? It's harmless... It's certainly not a cause for you to not see eachother. If her parents are strict and don't want you fooling around, then they shouldn't let you hang out in a bedroom alone. There are things that parents can do to keep an eye on their kids. Honestly, it just feels like lazy parenting.

Of course, I don't have a daughter at this point. I may be the kind of dad who would have brought out my shotgun before you even got through the door...

Either way, if I were you, I wouldn't feel bad. I would be upset that you got caught... but the fact that you did it is not the issue. Actually, I wish I could give you a high five. But yea, just wait out the summer and hang out with friends, but don't feel bad about this. Or if you find another girl with more lenient parents then you can hang out with her instead (just kidding...)

[God-I-Suck]

but I am stupid for fooling around anyway

Wait seriously? That's what you did? Why is that an issue? That's what teenagers do isn't it? It's harmless... It's certainly not a cause for you to not see eachother. If her parents are strict and don't want you fooling around, then they shouldn't let you hang out in a bedroom alone. There are things that parents can do to keep an eye on their kids. Honestly, it just feels like lazy parenting.

Lmao Lingus you kill me.. However that may be true but the thing is we broke a rule to be alone . The mother had no idea we were together at the time . Also, I took her word not to fool around like that so early in the relationship, but guess what ? I disrespected all of her rules. Not only that but she did so much for me and treated me like I was a part of the family.. At the time I was too stupid to realize what I had, and now it's gone.

[stick d00d]

Honestly it seems like the whole thing might blow over. Her parents might realize they are being a little hard on you and might give you a second chance. But of course I've never met them so I could be wrong...  :-\ Maybe you could try sitting down and talking with them? Just a suggestion. Hope everything works out for you.

[Lucifer]

Seems to me like a clear cut case of the ol' hand in the cookie jar. There was a rule, you broke said rule, you got caught, now you're facing the consequences. What can you do other than apologize and wait until you're allowed to eat cookies again? I mean, other than taking Lingus's advice of finding another batch of cookies and EATING THEM ALL.

[DarkTrinity]

but I am stupid for fooling around anyway

Wait seriously? That's what you did? Why is that an issue? That's what teenagers do isn't it? It's harmless... It's certainly not a cause for you to not see eachother. If her parents are strict and don't want you fooling around, then they shouldn't let you hang out in a bedroom alone. There are things that parents can do to keep an eye on their kids. Honestly, it just feels like lazy parenting.

Of course, I don't have a daughter at this point. I may be the kind of dad who would have brought out my shotgun before you even got through the door...

Either way, if I were you, I wouldn't feel bad. I would be upset that you got caught... but the fact that you did it is not the issue. Actually, I wish I could give you a high five. But yea, just wait out the summer and hang out with friends, but don't feel bad about this. Or if you find another girl with more lenient parents then you can hang out with her instead (just kidding...)

No Lingus!! It'll be like a gateway drug, fooling around will lead to naughtier things!! lol. But let's keep in mind he also said things too. Which could have been far more inappropriate :P

also, lmao @ Lucifer's response.

[God-I-Suck]

Honestly it seems like the whole thing might blow over. Her parents might realize they are being a little hard on you and might give you a second chance. But of course I've never met them so I could be wrong...  :-\ Maybe you could try sitting down and talking with them? Just a suggestion. Hope everything works out for you.

I came across the idea of talking with the mom (the father doesn't care really) and I wouldn't know what to say lol. Honestly just the thought of looking them in the face again is scary |: thank you (:

Seems to me like a clear cut case of the ol' hand in the cookie jar. There was a rule, you broke said rule, you got caught, now you're facing the consequences. What can you do other than apologize and wait until you're allowed to eat cookies again? I mean, other than taking Lingus's advice of finding another batch of cookies and EATING THEM ALL.

Haha , I've tried different ways of trying to forget about it but it always seems to come back to me /: I wish I was better as these kind of things lol.